I found them in pdf on the interweb. So glad I didn’t pay/have them in actual paper form. I wouldn’t be able to resist burning them the next time we have a bbq.

Exactly! Thank you! I think what pissed me off the most was that she paid for those fucking things! I was like, Mom, if you want to read this shit you let me know and I will meet someone in a dirty tumblr back alley and illegally procure them for you. To which of course my mother replies by asking me what tumblr is *head desk*

But the best part was explaining to her what fanfiction is. Seriously, that was… well, awkward as fuck doesn’t even begin to describe it.

Oh Suzi….

the gif attached accurately describes me face the entire way through 50 shades of shite.

And here was me when she showed me that she’d bought the books…

I am sad to report that my mother has not only finished reading 50 Shades of Gray, but she is now reading the sequel. I am trying very, very hard not to set her books on fire while she sleeps.